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Portfolio's Jesse Eisinger, who predicted the i-banking collapse last year (when everyone else was buying subprime mortgages) offers economic advice to Barack Obama: "Shoot the Zombies, Mr. President!" Under this horror-movie headline, Eisinger argues that Obama's plan is "incremental, timid, and full of compromise" and lists six reasons the president "is sucking," including the bad bank proposal, "pathetic and empty symbolism," and wasting political capital.