Washington Redskins fans have more to worry about than their shaky team and crazy owner: Their starting tight end is embroiled in a bizarre lawsuit—and despite his total lack of legal training, he’s representing himself. Fred Davis is now 18 months into fighting claims filed against him by 33-year-old Makini R. Chaka, who alleges Davis dumped juice on her, assaulted her, and threatened to kill her. Chaka is seeking both a permanent restraining order and monetary damages. One of Davis’s bodyguards has claimed in court documents that Chaka is a “a ‘madam/pimpette’ who provides escorts to high-profile athletes and entertainers.” Hopefully for ‘Skins fans, Davis, who missed a chunk of last season due to a failed drug test, will prove as deft at civil legal proceedings as he is at catching passes.