Taliban Denounces The Daily Beast

Everyone is a media critic now. The Taliban denounced The Daily Beast for violating “the basic principles of journalism” for our November 1 article detailing top-secret meeting the terrorist group held near Islamabad. Not content merely to criticize The Daily Beast's journalistic ethics, Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid argued that this website is run by “famous intelligence agents” (we’re conducting an internal investigation). Our knuckle-dragging critics also lectured the The Daily Beast for not contacting the Taliban’s media spokesman or regurgitating its semi-literate press releases. “Attributing false statements to the Islamic Emirate and associating with [sic] unknown figures with us violates the basic principles of journalism,” Mujahid says. Thanks for the tip, Taliban! It’s always fun to be lectured about ethics by a terrorist organization dedicated to bringing the world back to the seventh century.